A New List!

I know exactly what you're thinking: "What's a "P" doing with a list, let alone two?" Believe me, I understand. Before you have a fear of me slipping completely into "J"ness and having a list of lists, let me explain.

It has been brought to my attention, most notably by Pr. David Hively, that we are all too quick to point out when people do things poorly but very slow to announce when someone does something well. While the "People Who Need a Punch in the Face" list is quite good and extensive, it should not be left unchecked. That being said, in order to maintain dualistic tension, I hereby announce the construction of the "People Who Deserve a Biscuit" list. The story of the biscuit is told in the post directly below this one.

The inaugural member of the "People Who Deserve a Biscuit" list is Pastor George Haynes from Rockport, Texas. Pastor Haynes is one of the Stewardship Key Leaders for the ELCA. He is organizing and heading the stewardship campaign at St. Mark. He preached three of the most energetic sermons I have ever seen, back to back to back. Then, he got up and gave two consecutive talks sharing the vision of the future with the congregation. Beyond that, he was up at 5 on Sunday morning, and it was nearly 2:30 when we dropped him off at the airport, still as upbeat and joyful as when I first saw him that morning. Sure, anybody might be able to do that, but here's the kicker...he's 79 years old. He truly is a model of following the vision and living a full life in the faith. Bravo, Pr. Haynes. Bra-vo, a biscuit for you.

DJ was wrong?!? But That's Only Happened One Other Time in History!

I know, that's what I was thinking. Well, it comes with an apology...sort of. You see "The guy who sold me my car" has to be pulled off the list. While he did have grand ideas about leaving me outside in the rain (see previous post), he did fix my car at reduced cost even though he didn't have to, and suggested some preventitive maintenance as well. This was enough to make me ambivalent as to whether or not he should be on the list, and so I decided to err on the side of grace (thank you Senor Luther). So the list has become one shorter, and if Ernesto wasn't dead already, he'd be quick to fill in the vacant spot. Expect more on that later, but for now, suffice it to say that the list has been truncated. Oh and on a side note 49ers to win the Super Bowl!

The Lists Continue...

Thanks to Dave and his People Who Should Get Rabies list and Chrisy and her 2x4 list, I have been inspired to continue my "People Who Need to be Punched in the Face" list.

Current addition: (play on the word edition (I chuckled once then realized it wasn't funny)) The Guy Who Sold Me My Car.

The story begins with him being in the unfortunate situation of trying to replace the Green Dragon, which is a spot I wish on nobody. The new car ran smoothly until about a week ago (two weeks after purchase) when the window stopped working, locking it in the "rolled down" position. I took it to a local shop, they said, "$360 bucks", I said, "I'll talk to 'The Guy Who Sold Me My Car'". There was an issue with the door when they sold it to me that they said they'd fix so they agreed to fix the window too, in case they were related.

Well, as you may have heard, Tropical Storm Ernesto is creeping its way up the coast, and is currently making Virginia rainy. The brilliant idea of "The Guy Who Sold Me My Car" was that I should drop the car off to them the evening before their mechanic came in, so he could look at it first thing. Which is a good idea, unless it is raining and your window won't roll up.

I drove 45 minutes in the (not pouring but definitely coming down) rain. Then when I got there, he had already left for the evening. After standing outside for a half an hour, assuming that I had misheard his words for the meeting, I called the building. We could hear the phone ringing inside, and the answering machine pick up. Well, on the answering machine there was an additional number to call, so I dialed it. He picked up promptly, and told me that he had called our house about 5 minutes before we got there to tell us he wasn't going to be there, and we could drop the car off and leave the key in the slot. This being after I talked to him the day before and confirmed that he would be there at the appointed time.

Now I'm not saying that there couldn't have been an emergency, but I'm gathering from the drunken voices of men yelling on the phone when I called that he wasn't in the hospital worried about his baby girl. Jwek. He's so on the punch in the face list that it isn't funny.

Reflection on July 4th, 2006

A couple of things popped in my mind:

1) Watching the third Terminator movie is kind of ironic on the 4th of July.

2) Mucho thankso to North Korea for celebrating Independence Day with us...jweks. They are so on the punch-in-the-face list it's not even funny. The next few days should be exciting to watch quick slingin' Bush Cassidy from the podium (or is it a lectern?).

3) Fireworks are exciting because they burn, and flash brightly, and make big bangs; three things which every youngster should not take part in, but they get exposure to every year. Maybe we'd have less burn accidents if we celebrated the Fourth of July by tying our feet to the bumper of a car and trying to do a handstand on a skateboard behind it. I admit, I blew my hand up with a bottle rocket once, and it wasn't because I watched fireworks the night before, but because burning, flashing, loud things are cool (thank you beavis and butthead); but i still have a right as a geezer to complain about how kids were smarter in my day and how they had more productive things to do than throw fireworks at eachother (don't take that as a suggestion).

4) How can we celebrate when our *snicker 5th ranked soccer team got annihalated by two, shall we call them, non-superpowers. We should be suspended from celebrating our nation in any way until we can at least tie the fourth graders from Iceland.

I've said my piece, Happy Fourth!